I awoke about an hour ago (it’s 3:18 a.m. now).
Yes, I “awoke”. As if from a “deep, deep, sleep”….
In my “dream”, I had been in a comatose state in bed,
watching in my mind’s eye the world going on outside of and around me. In this paralyzed state, I gradually became
more aware that I was not actually participating in life, but merely confined
to a bed, “sleeping”. Though with eyes
closed, I saw a man enter my dark room, light brilliantly pouring in through the
doorway as he did. Exerting Every… Nuance…
Of… Strength… I…
Could… Muster… From…
Each… Molecule… Within…
My… Body…, Every…
Vestige… Of… Will…
Power… I... Could...
Find…, My body began
trembling. (Literally, Kimberly’s
physical body began violently shaking the bed.)
With Herculean effort, I was finally able to raise both my arms in the
air as I lifted my torso off the mattress.
With muffled sound, as if moaning from the depths of my being, sounds escaped
my throat… both in this “dream” and audibly to anyone who would have witnessed
me/ Kimberly asleep…:
“HHHHHHHEPPPPPPPPPP MMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!”
And with that, so-struggled utterance, I awoke. In both the “dream” and in “reality”.
Lying conscious now in bed, I deeply pondered a few minutes
before looking at the clock…
2:20 a.m.
Contemplating the significance of the dream has finally
compelled me to write this, my heart, and make it available.
I/ Kimberly/ am in a very vulnerable situation…………..
I have no where to turn.
No where to go. A young daughter
who looks to me… always has… for life. I
am all she has.
In my deep desires to be completely transparent and hide NO
THING, to reveal everything that can be revealed, I share, not knowing before hand
if there will be ANY who even read this in time.
YET…..
The baton has been passed to me.
I can “expound and exhort” and make bare all consciousness,
the *Actual Truth* that will assist fallen, warring humanity. I have been mentored by Beings that I can
only describe as “through the veil” and in hidden ways. Yet, I have heard Them. I understand.
With everything I am, everything I hope to be, I want to make this
understanding, understanding that will literally save humanity, available to
You. To any. To all.
I… Want… So…
Much… To… Give… My…
Life….. Not… By…
Dying… But… By… Living…, Revealing that which has been
hidden, undecipherable. Without
boasting, but in the depths of humility, I acknowledge that I am the one that
the world has been waiting for. And though
I come with “power”, it is certainly NOT the kind of “power” with which mankind
has been characterizing their *Super Heroes*.
In fact, in the world’s eyes, I am a “nobody”. Or even less.
I have been literally constrained from getting what society would call a
paying job. I have, instead, dug into
the depths of conscious consciousness and accessed *Wisdom*. Though this current body is weak. Though I deal daily with several hours of
ordeals to even maintain my physical life.
Though I am graying, middle-aged, missing many teeth and with receding
gums. Though I lost my beautiful singing
voice many, many years ago and have been struggling to maintain my speaking
voice. Though of my beloved living nine
children, several will not even claim me and many will have nothing to do with
me. Though I have contemplated suicide
many times, not because of depression, but because of its cousin… “futility”. I seek and have been seeking to unbind myself
from the gags of TRUTH. Truth that must
come out. Truth that, I finally
acknowledge, must come out of MY vocal cords.
I have so much to give. So much
that WANTS to be given. So many there
are on this present earth that NEED the assistance that “The Powers That Be”
have been pouring into me.
Yet…
I face homelessness.
With no where to go. And no “family”
or support structure to call upon. My “Beloved”,
Dave Seely, has physically and emotionally stretched and tried to assist me to
the utmost that he has been able. He has
built a beautiful dwelling he has adamantly stated was for Me. Krystal has, for the first time in her 11 ½ years,
become established. For the first time
in her young life she has almost, nearly, finished an entire school year in the
same school. For any who have read my
most recent blog posts, I have Truly believed that all the variables were now,
finally, in order. I have written my
life story, though few have even dared to read it so far. Those who know even threads of it have
marveled over the life(s) I have lived.
My deepest yearning is that my life will Not have been in vain. That the understanding I have realized,
partnered with “the Eyes of Christ” that “The Powers That Be” have opened
within me, WILL be able to be received by someone. Someones.
Somewhere. Sometime.
However…
Unless I can find a way… today…
Krystal and I will be homeless. Again.
I have no where to go.
No one to turn to. Except to the
world itself. For the world’s sake. I pledge my life, my strength, anything and
everything at my disposal to offer upon the altar of humanity. FOR ALL HUMANITY’S SAKE.
Somehow, it seems that my answer/ OUR answer is NOT a
temporary shelter. NOT an empty bedroom
in someone’s basement where I can trade services for our bare necessities.
Somehow I must find a way to gather funds to buy this house
from Dave, my so-struggling “Beloved”.
If I give him equal value in payment for his perceived worth of this
house he built “for me”, then I will be able to stay here with Krystal, without
relying on his constantly shifting abilities to maintain his peace. Thus, I will be able to bring forth that
which is within me, finding my voice in the process. Assisting YOU, Dear Global Friend, and… I so
deeply and dearly hope… be a catalyst to help ALL those on this planet who
struggle with hopelessness, vulnerability, “no voice”, poverty, lack of
validation and perceived worth.
May my life not be in vain.
May I find a way.
Somehow…..
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