Quora Q: How do I control my mother-in-law?

Why would you Ever want to Control Her… or Anyone?

One Person (your Self) is enough for most of us! :-)

However, you Can:

*Realize that she is an equally precious and valuable person.

*Learn to Truly love Your Self. (I invite you to read my answer at: Kimberly Davis Wallis' answer to I've always thought of myself as a nuisance and expect that people hate me from the get go. I don't have a single friend. What should I do?

Or: Kimberly Davis Wallis' answer to How do you handle familial rejection? )

*Release your expectations for her to be anyone different than she is choosing to be.

*Change your attitude about her.

*Change your interactions with her.

How is your spouse regarding his or her mother? Are you in alignment with your desires regarding interaction with her? This is essential.

As you love (RESPECT) your self, you may feel to invite a communication with her regarding your relationship. If so: Begin, in sincerity, by offering specific areas where you genuinely respect Her. Share the areas that You have not felt respected from her in your past interactions. Lay them out on the table. It is essential that you listen with the intent of understanding her perspective. Give her an opportunity to present that viewpoint. Sincerely ask for clarification, restating what you think you are hearing. During your discussion, if it feels appropriate, ask yourself and her: Is there a way to stay True to Your individual selves and maintain an interactive and healthy relationship? If not, don’t be afraid to choose to have no contact (or boundaries to that contact). Realize that it is impossible to have had identical learning experiences and, thus, ways of seeing the world and each other… even if you two were identical to begin with. Yet, she may have, probably does have, valuable insights and personality traits… if you can look for them openly. Look for them. Sincerely acknowledge them.

As you stand in your firm and mutually respectful Power, you will navigate yourself through this relationship, making adjustments along the way. It is even possible that you will learn to appreciate and even LIKE your mother in law at some future point.

I hope this helps.